How to Host an Autism-friendly Christmas

I am an autistic adult, and almost everyone I know is also autistic. Throughout the years we have created an autistic lifestyle that makes Christmas easier for everyone. Here I’m gonna share it with you so you also can create the best Christmas ever. Because if there is one thing autism has taught me, is that if it’s good for us, it’s even better for neurotypicals.

We often have a regular starting time that’s used over and over again

This way everyone knows what’s expected of them. If we have to start at an unusual time as 4 e.g. ( too late for Fika but too early for everyone to be home from work) we explain in the invitation what we have planned to do. 

Side note, if there are some ADHD among us, we usually set the starting time 60 to 30 minutes earlier than needed so that they have time to be late.

We actually don’t memorise all of our friend's comfort food and safe food

Instead, we cook some safe bets, and then around them we add comfort- and safe food. One safe bet is to always cook food that’s not mixed with something else. Tacos are one good example of a food that’s not mixed together, you make your mix. But if we want to make a certain meal we make sure that there is some cooked potato or pasta, whiteout the sauce. And that there are some types of plain seasoned meat.

We don’t remove things that can be a sensory hasard for ur autistic guests

But then, we are autistic so we already live in homes that are sensory safe. But, if we were to remove things, the first thing we would do would be to consider the eight senses. And most importantly, the senses we a person can't as easily control. Such as sound sight and balance.

We ignore insults from our autistic friends

Or to be precise, we ignore insults that we know weren’t meant as an insult. And if we know them well enough, we make sure to point out to them that they insulted us and explain to them why. 

We don’t force our autistic peers to open Christmas gifts

Surprises are not our favourite thing, so no one is forced to open a Christmas gift. It’s perfectly ok bring it home and open it later.

Everyone is treated equally and by their age, even those who have an intellectual disability

And when I say by their age I mean it. If alcohol is served, everyone who wants gets a drink.

We always encourage each other to take a break and rewind in a calm space

We already have on paper that we are bad at social interactions, so why enforce it??? That would be like forcing a wheelchair user to crawl up to the second floor. No one would do that. Also, we don’t get mad if a friend declines an invitation, we know that they are home charging their batteries for something more important.

We always have a neutral space for our guests

This can be as simple as placing an armchair in a quiet corner of our home or a daybed in a spare room. The important thing is that you create a calm space where your guest can be alone and rewind. Something we never do is prepare stim toys for our guests. Preferences of stimming are something personal and often we bring our own favourites with us.

Ok, I hope I made the autistic lifestyle understandable. I do after all have on paper that I’m not so good at social communication. Have a merry Christmas.